Hard lesson learned.....

Over the last several months Jack has been playing with a little boy that is not a good influence. This little boy is teaching him to be aggressive and foul language. We will just call this little boy John (yes I changed his name). It has gotten so bad that John has been pulled out of the classroom some days more than he is in the classroom. To be honest I was quite relieved because Jack is much better behaved when not with John.

When Jack and John moved into the pre-kindergarten room together I was hoping a new room, new teachers, a fresh start and Jack would be better behaved. Something weird happened though. Everyday when I picked Jack up John would come running over and touch Jack. He would hold his hand and not want to let go. I used to think it was kind of creepy. It made me feel like this little boy had some type of hold on Jack. I asked Jack to make new friends.

I really wanted Jack to separate himself from John. His teachers even said they have no problem with him when he is separated from John. Somehow the two of them always manage to find each other and end up playing together. I talked to the director about it. She said she observed the two of them playing and they were interacting well, she was really impressed.

So I kind of left it alone but I truly did not like it because I didn't like the way it made Jack act. Jack would bring the aggressive behavior home against Katie and Maddie and it really bothered me.

That is until Friday............

One other side note is that over time I have figured out that John's family was having problems. Really bad problems, his situation at home was sad.

So Friday I go into Jack's classroom to pick him up. Jack did not want to go home because the class was watching a movie. I told him that we had to get home so we could have dinner with Daddy before he had to go to the doctor. Phil had his sleep test Friday night.

John was sitting in the classroom watching the movie too but separate from the rest of the class. He heard what I said to Jack and asked me, "What does Jack's Daddy do".

I told him the his daddy was coming home from work to have dinner with us. John pipes up and says, "I don't see my Daddy".

At that moment it hit me I was teaching my son the wrong thing....................

What I should have done is teach my son that it is okay to play with John but it is not okay to say bad words or be mean to other people. Instead I was teaching my son to abandon a little boy who's parents separated and John was not allowed to see his Daddy. The reason John was trying to hold Jack's hand was that he did not want Jack to leave. Jack is one of the constants in John's life that makes part of his horrible life normal.

At that very moment in the classroom I wanted to take John home with me and let him have fun with Jack. I wanted him to sit and one of our crazy family dinners and just see what it is like. Things may be chaotic at my house but my children know that their Daddy loves them and would rather be at any family dinner then not with them.

When I thought I was protecting Jack I was in fact making a little boys miserable life even more miserable. I should have been teaching Jack how to love him. Instead, I was teaching Jack the easy way out by ignoring John and also abandoning him. It made me cry because I feel like I failed my son. The funny part about the whole thing is that my son disobeyed me and still plays with John everyday.

There was one point a few weeks ago that I was hoping Jack and John would go to different kindergartens so that Jack could show his true potential and not be influenced by the negative things that John's family has taught him. There is now a part of me that thinks if the two of them ended up in the same school it wouldn't be so bad. I think in a way Jack would protect him and always be his friend.

We try so hard to do what is best for our children. Sometimes the best decisions come from listening to our children. Their innocent view of life makes all the complications just melt away and the right answer is staring you in the face.

I feel like such a horrible mother for not seeing it. I am just glad Jack showed me before it was too late and I made a rash decision. Now I just need to figure out how to teach Jack it is OK to play with John but not everything he does is OK. Hopefully over time Jack will figure it out too.


TTFN

Boring just once please...........

Certain things have really started to settle down and I don't feel so on edge with Maddie. I do worry about flu season. This will be Maddie's first real flu season and I need to keep her healthy. Other than that the days are starting to get routine.....which would be nice for a while.



That is until Monday morning.......................



It was really chaotic trying to get the kids up, dressed and off to school. If the routine is off by just minutes I am anywhere from 15-20 minutes late for work. It makes me crazy. Well I have told you about Lady and some of her idiosyncrasies. One of them is she stays upstairs until we get out the door in the morning because of the chaos.

So the kids and I left for the school and work drop off routine. I thought nothing more until I came home from work that day. I had not lifted the garage door yet but I could hear Lady barking. I had left her outside all day. I thought Phil let her in, at least that what he usually does. I do realize she is a dog, however she had no food or water and we are still in the 80's and she is a black haired dog.

She was panting horribly and drank a whole bowl of water and passed out on the floor for a while. After she slept for a while and cooled off inside she appeared to be fine. I am such a bad pet Mommy. Well I kind of left her alone to recover and had to take care of the kids for dinner, showers/bath and any homework they might have.

Phil gets home it is further chaos...................................

About 3am Katie woke up because she accidentally wet her bed. I was really tired. I stripped her bed helped her change her clothes and let her crawl in our bed. I didn't really worry about the lack of sleep because I was off Tuesday and I could take a nap when Maddie slept. Well at 6am I went to get Jack up and he too had flooded his bed. So badly that I had to put him back in the shower before school.

While I am doing this Lady starts dancing around. I told Phil Lady needed to go out. He was out of the shower but not completely dressed. I told him there are curtains on the windows go let Lady out no one will care at 6am. Well he did not heed my advice. Lady went running downstairs however, as soon as she hit the ceramic tile at the bottom the flood began. From the bottom of the stairwell at the front door all they way around the living room to the gate that leads to the kitchen and the back door Lady peed.

Phil didn't know it and stepped in it. To be honest, I laughed because I told him she had to go out but what does a wife know who only works part time. Phil yelled when he stepped in it and then I heard lights clicking on.......Phil was stunned at all the pee he saw. I figured I better go help him clean it up. So what does he do brings me the trash can and paper towels kisses me good bye and has the nerve to say Love you.

So I was in my jammies cleaning and mopping half the downstairs while Maddie was still sleeping, Katie was waking up and Jack was getting dressed. Phil usually lets Lady out before he goes to bed however he forgot. Lady drank a bowl of water and then let it fly because she had to hold it too long. Needless to say when I walk Katie to the bathroom between 11 and 12 I now let Lady out too just in case.

Although, my life with Maddie and her recovery is less and less exciting....THANK GOD.....there are plenty of other events that have decided to fill in where that part of life has left off.

TTFN

Just a little tid bit..........

It has been a very busy week, a little too stressful even for me and I am simply exhausted. Last Friday Maddie had to go to the Doctor for a fever. It is really dangerous for a heart patient to get a fever. However 5 hours after seeing the doctor and medications she was still burning up and her heart was racing, really racing. I called the doctor and he sent us to the children's hospital. After several hours and several tests they sent us home. Thankfully, Saturday morning the fever was gone.

Poor Phil has worked everyday since September 8th. At this point, it is a contest to see who is more exhausted. I think I will just let him win. Some day I will catch up on my sleep.

My friend who had surgery Tuesday had a rough 24 hours after surgery but she is stable and very slowly getting stronger. It has been really rough on her family and my stress and lack of sleep is dull in comparison as they watch over her as she recovers.

Even Katie and Jack have had it rough. Phil has worked late almost every night this week so it has just been me and the kids. We take care of Katie's agenda for school and we have been practicing learning and writing words as she will soon be able to read. However when it is just me they only get me 33% of the time and I am sure for Katie it is even less. Hopefully all of us will get more sleep over the weekend and start fresh Monday.

Jack not to be out done wants to do "homework" too. He is just sucking everything in that I am teaching Katie. However, earlier this week he came home with a paper he was to practice writing the capital letter "A" at school. He was very lazy about it at school so I made him sit down and write it twenty times before he could play. He did it. Surprisingly with very little argument. I think he wanted the attention from me.

While I have been working with Katie and Jack, Maddie either plays in the pack n play where she can see us or sits in the booster seats and eats a snack. Another big thing I did this week was to take the bottle away from Maddie. I had a meeting with the nutritionist Tuesday and she gave me ways to supplement the milk till she stops refusing to drink the milk from a sippy cup. Now mind you she will drink juice from a sippy cup but refused the milk. That is until today. Maddie had a great week for eating.

She ate all the lunches the school provided which is all table food. She even had their afternoon snack. She still is giving us a hard time with table food at home but it is getting better. I have to be careful though. I will supplement a little bit of baby food to make sure she gets enough calories due to the sippy cup milk boycott. However, tonight at dinner she had pasta, a little chicken, some puffs, peas, oranges and she drank 4oz of milk out of her sippy cup. It was a small giant victory.

Once Maddie can feed herself completely and drink 16oz of milk a day with the sippy cup she will move to the next room. The teachers at the school all know Maddie and what she has been through. They cheer everyday at her little leaps and bounds. Because they have had to also make cut backs all the teachers help out in every room. Some days they disagree over who will be in the baby room because it is a day that Maddie will be there. It is kind of cute.

As I close this days post I will leave you with something that happened today. As I went to go pick up Jack I always check his folder and read his daily report. This way I can ask questions if it has been a not so good day. So as I am reading it I see the following.....He ate most of his lunch.....He slept at rest time.....He enjoyed show and tell and writing today.....His over all day was good.....and then I see this............

.........Jackson's sucker was thrown away because he was told not to eat it and he hid in the refrigerator eating it.........So yes he crawled in the housekeeping center plastic refrigerator and ate his sucker thinking they would not see or find him.

An "A" for creativity my son.

So as you can see I survived the week I am getting ready to send the kids to bed and go find mine. Hoping you have a great weekend.

TTFN

update on Mama K

Found out about an hour ago the surgery went well. We will know in the next 24 hours how she responds to everything. Her family has been very kind to let us know. Thanks to those that prayed.

Mama K

I have never posted much about work or the people I work with. However today is an exception.

Some of you already know this but I share an office with the owner's secretary and the general manager. I have almost always been the youngest one in the entire office area. The general manager reminds me of my brother sometimes and the secretary is a lot like my grandmother back home. I have shared this office with them for about three years and it has always made for interesting days.

The secretary has been such a kind lady. I believe she has a heart of gold. She needed work done in her house and Phil did it for her. She has a grandson a few years older than my son and she sends me clothes and toys that used to be his. If it wasn't for her I have no idea how I would have clothed my son some seasons.

Lucky enough to be semi-retired the secretary only worked three days a week. Personally I think she worked just to have bingo money. But who am I too judge. She told me about a test she had to have. Because she has a pace-maker she had to have this test done at the hospital. That was last Thursday. Sometime this morning she goes in for open heart surgery. She is the mother of six, traditional Catholic family, and all of her children came home to be with her. I know all about growing up in a Catholic family. We would occasionally joke about that.

Conditions for her are going to be rough. If she pulls through it will be a long recovery. Something we are very familiar with. However, I am not sure she will ever return to work. It makes me very sad. I will miss my friend.

Monday, at work, I had to take care of some things she usually handles. I went to her desk and pulled open the drawer to get a pen. There inside was a button pin that read 'I survived catholic school' it made me laugh. She is in God's hands now and we will see what God has in store for her later today.

TTFN

The NC Zoo

Not that it should shock anyone but I am about a week behind in some items that I wanted to post. Back on Labor Day we decided to take the kids to the NC Zoo. We invited Grandma and Grandpa Bacho to join us. It was a very long day as we walked a little over four miles throughout the zoo. It was a great day and I am very glad that we went. Attached are some photos that I took. Enjoy!

TTFN

Chicken Wings

About once every two weeks we used to go out to dinner or get take out. But in an effort to save money we have limited it to once a month or not at all. Recently, Phil decided that he wanted pizza and chicken wings for dinner from Donato's. We have had their pizza before but Thursday night we decided to test the chicken wings.

Usually Jack and I eat the pizza and Phil and Katie eat the chicken wings and pizza. I ordered regular barbecue wings for Katie and the hot wings for Phil. Katie was having problems with her chicken wings and Phil was showing her how to break them apart to eat them. All of the sudden Katie started crying and was waving her hand in front of her mouth. Phil accidentally got the hot sauce on Katie's wings and she ate it. It took Phil and I about 2 minutes to figure out what had happened. It didn't stop her though.

Kaitlynn LOVES chicken wings. Usually by the time she is done eating them she looks like she was attacked by one. Sauce all over her face, sticky fingers, you almost have to take her straight to the shower. I could never figure out her love for them until someone asked me what I craved when I was pregnant. For Kaitlynn it was chicken wings. I craved them all the time. I could never get enough of them. It was so bad that Phil actually got sick of them for a while. Kaitlynn on the other hand will eat them anytime.

Just for Isabelle.........

Dear Isabelle,
I have not had the pure privilege to have met you yet but I already know I will love you to pieces, when that day comes. You see my sweet angel, your very blessed mother is my BEST friend.


About 23 years ago almost to the day I met your mother as we were entering high school as freshmen. Because our last names were close we always sat near each other. I remember going to school dances, eating lunch together, when she got a job going to visit her there. She actually helped me get my first job.

We were college roommates until she decided to join the Navy. I was so heart-broken. I missed my friend all the time. College just wasn't the same without her. One thing I know about your mother is that she should have bought stock in hallmark. I have received more cards from her than humanly possible, for every reason and no reason at all. The only more shocking fact is that I still have EVERY ONE, boxes of them.

Your mother and I were born exactly a week apart. The first time I had to celebrate my birthday without her because she was in the Navy she sent your grandparents Janet and James to my work to deliver my gift. It is one of my favorite memories of your grandmother. I loved your grandmother she was so funny. She had such a quick wit about her that if you weren't paying attention you missed some of the best one liners.

When your grandmother was ill your mother called me so much. I didn't even know what to say to her to help ease her pain. When your grandmother passed away I could not get to your mother fast enough. I just wanted to be with her. I don't even know if I was any help to her I just wanted to be there. Don't worry your mother has a LONG memory and she will tell you all about your amazing grandmother.

Even more amazing though, is your mother. She told me that one of her best birthday presents was the day you were conceived. I was pregnant with my third child before we knew you were coming in to this world. I could not understand why I would be blessed with a another child when I knew how much your mother wanted to be a mother. Your mother was very happy for us but my heart hurt for her. I wished with my whole heart for your mother to have a child. Some nights I even cried about it.

The one thing I forgot is that God's timing is perfect. Not only did He provide you with one of the best mother's on the planet, your pure existence filled her heart. When your mother had complications while she was carrying you, I was really scared. You were born premature and I was worried. I called your mother all the time checking on you and her. Then one day it hit me again. "God's timing is perfect" and I suddenly just knew you would be just fine.

So my sweet girl, I hope you find the best friend in your mother that I did. I hope you learn to treasure every minute with her. I hope you find the stellar woman in her that I did. I hope the celebration of the rest of your birthday's is as sweet as the first.

Hoping to meet you soon and cover you in hugs and kisses.

HAPPY 1ST BIRTHDAY ISABELLE!!!!!!!

TTFN-
Chelsea

The Kids Rooms

Over the past 4-5 weeks I have spent a lot of my spare time working on the kids rooms and re-arranging the upstairs. What used to be the bonus/guest room/office is now the girls room. It still needs curtains, the rest of Katie's things hung up and some type of closet storage but I am almost there.

What used to be the girls' room is now Jack's room. It also still need curtains, a new ceiling fan and a few more items on the wall but he is very happy with it. Yes I painted each wall a different color. I was inspired by his bedding set.

I have not added photos of what used to be Jack's room and is now the spare room. I have much of my craft, for lack of better terms "crap" on the bed I am still sorting through. However, I thought I would share what I have done so far. My hope is to have it finished and all my craft stuff re-organized by the end of the week.

TTFN.......