Heart of a Champion

What an amazing afternoon. At the last LCK (Levine Cardiac Kids meeting) there was an announcement that Heart of a Champion was looking for volunteers. This is a day where upcoming 10th, 11th and 12 grade athletes in charlotte can sign up and get free screenings. They get an echo of there heart the whole nine yards.

Can you imagine what it takes to screen over 1800 students in less that eight hours. The amount of doctores, nurses, techs and just plain ol people like me. It was really fun. I was supposed to be working the volunteer check in table. However when I got there they needed more help at the athlete check in tables. Think about this.....about every 45 minutes there were 300 students walking through the doors. This day was planned down to a science

Technically I was not supposed to have any contact with the patients because I was not a Carolina Healthcare Systems employee. However when I walked in and told them I do not have a hospital ID I was just a volunteer. The lady knew it and sent me out there anyway. It was fun by the end of the afternoon we were guessing what sport the student played when they walked in the door and the afternoon went by really fast.

I still believe there is a reason all of this happened to us with Madelynn. That there is a road I still need to travel in my life that I would have never fathomed had it not been for Madelynn. I still think it has something to do with the hospital. However, needles and blood not really my thing. I thought about just finding out about volunteering and the hospital. Hopefully the light will come on as to what this journey entails because it is really tugging on me right now.

It still gives me chills to drive down the main enterance of the hospital because the first thing you see os the Levine's Children's Hospital all lit up. Someday I hope it becomes a comfort knowing they saved her life.

TTFN

Trip to the beach part 1

Below you will see some of the photos I took while at the beach over Memorial Day Holiday. I took over 500 Photos and these are some of my favorites. I have a few projects I want to work on that will take a while. I will do a separate post of the kids and family. I wanted to show some of the scenery first.

I can not even put into words what a great time we had. Phil and his siblings have such fond memories and really happy times at this point in their lives. I can truly see why. There was just a sense of peace. I never looked at my watch or cared a ton about meals. Some how I just knew when it was time to feed Maddie. It really was great.

In a five day period we visited Ft. Macon (before the wedding), spent time with the kids at the beach, Phil, Jason, Jacque, Sandy, Franka and Tony went to Cherry Point, Had the Wedding at the top of Ft. Macon and took some family photos at the beach, Went to Cape Hatteras and walked all 500 plus stairs up and down, the view was amazing, went to Kitty Hawk (my personal favorite) and on Memorial Day we toured the USS North Carolina.

I believe the best part is that I went there with no expectations and only know we would be at the beach, we were there for a wedding and I was taking pictures. All the rest of the trip was decided after we got there. I can not wait to go back as the kids get older so they can appreciate all there is to do.

Family photos coming up soon.

TTFN

The stranger is gone. LOL

In a previous post here I told you about Phil's deoderant issue. The stranger is gone and the smell of the man I married is back. The strange smelling deoderant is all used up. LOL LOL LOL

Are you kidding me??????

You hear about it all the time....it is a common practice for most little boys....and it is no different for my little boy. We have been working with Jack because he has had lots of problems with behavior. I have even contacted a family therapist to help my little man. I met with her today for the first time. After the meeting and some of the things she said I decided to give Jack his toys back.

For most of you that don't know, about 2-3 weeks ago I was called at work by the director of the daycare because of a very embarressing behavoir my son exhibited. I know I should not laugh but I can't even say it out loud with out laughing now. Anyway to punish him I cleaned out his entire room of toys. I boxed them up and put them in the kitchen. He would have to pass them every day out the door to school to remind him why he has to be good in school. I told him he could earn them back with good behavior. He only earned a few back.

Ok so today I decided we would give him the toys back. Phil was working late so after dinner Katie, Jack, Maddie and I went up to Jack's room. I carried Maddie up and then made trips up and down the stairs with boxes of toys. Jack was very excited to get them back. Then something stange happened.

I looked at Jack and he is picking his nose like he looking for buried treasure. He has a had time with a dry nose. So bad that we run a humidifier quite often. So I tell him to go get the saline spray and some tissues and I would make it feel better. He gets about a foot from me with the saline can and just starts SOBBING!!!!!!

Quickly I remind him that I do this all the time. I asked him if I have ever hurt him before and he says no. I was not ready for the next phrase......But Mommy there is really something up there. It took about a whole minute before I realized there was something up there.......and he put it there.

Here goes my racing mind......okay it is 7pm urgent care closes in 1 hour, Phil is at least 40 mins away, who can watch Katie and Maddie so I can get him there (the urgent care is 1 mile away), what in the world is up there, how far?????? So after I calm down and call my neighbor she doesn't answer. So I start working on his nose.

I was feeling on the outside to see how far up his nose whatever it is is. I try to start working it down without putting anything else up there. I was just rubbing my fingers on the outside of his nose working it down when all of the sudden I hear FLING!!!! I look at Jack's nose and out comes the blood.

After I stopped the bleeding I start looking around for whatever it was that went fling. I asked Jack 3 times if he was sure it was out of his nose. What I found was a little plastic red craft light bulb. As if my son doesn't have enough bright ideas he felt sticking a red light bulb up his nose was necessary. I asked him another three times if that was what he stuck up his nose and if that was all he stuck up his nose. He assured me that it was. He has never even watched the story of Rudolf....Where does he come up with this stuff????

Hope all of you had a great chuckle over this one and whatever parenthood test that was I just experienced I hope I passed with flying colors....especially red.

Never a dull moment.....

TTFN

hyped up

So many things to share and not enough hours in the day. We just came home from a great time at the beach in NC. I have so much to share about that but I have a better story right now. To take a family of five to the beach is quite a feat. All the packing for each personality and needs and favorite things....you get my point. And of course Maddie still has a few special needs. She became ill about a week before we left and needed extra breathing treatments. She is getting better for her it just takes extra time.

One night we were doing the usual, dinner and bath night. We had some extra help because Phil's mom was there. Phil was bathing Maddie, I was controlling the shower and Grandma was help dress or what ever else we needed.

I have this nervous tick, maybe an anxiety tick but I spin my engagement ring around on my finger. Most of the time I don't even know I am doing it. While the bath/shower chaos was going on I suddenly felt a sharp poke. I caught myself spinning my ring and something was wrong. When I looked down the diamond was gone. One of the prongs appeared to be damaged.

Suddenly my mind was racing what did I do and where do I look????? I remembered my ring snagging on a towel I handed Phil. So I was frantically searching the bathroom floor and could just feel my heart breaking. I am not superstitious but it just like a bad omen. I never found it. I very sadly removed the empty ring and put it in my jewelry box.

At the time Phil proposed we made almost no money. He had only been out of school about a year and had just been at his job a little less than a year. A few people made him feel bad that the diamond was small. I didn't care, I wasn't much a jewelry person. So for my first Mother's Day Phil bought me this beautiful ring. He told me it was to replace my engagement ring. I told him no. I love the new ring and will wear it but I have an engagement ring already.

So when I went to bed the night the diamond was lost I was very depressed and could not figure out what was going on or why it happened. The next few days I would stop in the middle of the day catching myself trying to spin a ring that was not there. Except for the last three months of pregnancy for each of my children I never took that ring off, EVER. I finally had to just not worry about it anymore and get it replaced, even though it would never be the same.

Tonight while waiting for the washer to finish I decided to clean the kitchen. We dumped so much stuff in the kitchen when we came home today my OCD was setting in and I need something to do. I started the dishwasher and wiped the counters down. All of the sudden, I heard a tinkling sound. I looked down and low and behold there was my diamond on the kitchen counter.

I was so excited I could not speak my brain was screaming OMG OMG OMG. Finally, I was actually able to verbalize it and Phil asked what my problem was. I said do you know what I am holding in my hand. Irritated he said NO What??? I said look closer and he just smiled.

So I still have to get it reset....but I found my diamond to my engagement ring.

I have so many fun things to share about our vacation and the wedding (Phil's brother was married this weekend) but the ring story was more exciting. I was so hyped up and it was kind of late I figured this was the best way to share.

The washer is probably done now.

TTFN

Graduation Day

Friday was Katie's graduation from pre-school. We were very lucky that we had Phil's mom, my mom, Ray and Linda (Katie's godparents) and the 5 of us there. It really was a great time and the kids were so funny. If I can figure out how to get the video downloaded to the blog I will. In the mean time see the little bit I put together below. Enjoy (turn up the volume)!

TTFN

slap out of ideas........

At one time in my life I wanted to have just boys. No girls. I was a girl and I know what they are like and I did not want to raise them. When we found out we were going to have a girl..I thought okay we can try again for a boy the next time. Don't get me wrong I love Katie with every ounce of my being but I really felt I would not be the best person for the job to raise girls.

When I found out that we were having Jack I cried. I was so excited. We were going to have one of each. Since Katie came first I was happy with one of each and we felt we were done. Now all I had to do was worry about raising them. Jack is a very smart boy. He thinks outside the box unlike any three year old I have ever met.

Lately we have had a lot of problems with him and I truly do not know what to do with him, neither does his school. He refuses to listen and only wants to do things his way. He can be incredibly difficult which is not conducive when you have 12 3 year olds. When I talk about Jack thinking outside the box here is an example. If the class is doing something that Jack is not interested in he will intentionally do something wrong so he has to sit in the "thinking chair" this way he does not have to participate. What three year old mind thinks this way.

This week alone he peed on another child on purpose, won't leave his pants up, was sent to the directors office where I was called at work, he bit another child, and just refuses to cooperate in class. I have taken ALL of his toys away. His room has a bed, dresser and empty shelves where toys used to be. I grounded him to his room where he could only leave to potty and eat dinner.

Tonight he was not allowed to watch TV and we have told him if he is not good he will stay with the neighbors at their house and we will go to the beach next week without him. Totally out of ideas and mentally whipped I went another avenue. I got out paper and pens and we worked on his numbers and shapes with him. If he wants one on one attention from me I am going to make him work for it.

I still believe that Jack is very intelligent and that his teachers are not going to be able to challenge him enough. So here we are I wrote out the #'s 1-5 on a piece of paper and then did little grouping of dots with the same numbers and asked him to match them. I would expect a 3 year old to count the numbers in the groups and then there to be a pause as to which # went with each grouping. For Jack there was no pause not even one long enough to see if he was counting the dot groupings. He blurted out the # and them quickly pointed to that #. Thinking I made it too easy I made groupings and of triangles and circles and asked him to match them up as to the quantity.

After that little 20 minutes exercise, which is great for Jack because they though he had an attention problem, I feel like they are not challenging him enough. I believe in his three year old mind he is bored with the class and the teachers that he feels he does not have to listen to them. I am completely out of ideas as to what to tell the school. There are parts of Katie's kindergarten prep exercises Jack does just as well if not better.

Some things he still needs help on but some one on one time I am sure he will achieve it. My problem now is making him understand that he has to listen to his teachers and that he is not in charge. I am out of ideas. Some days after he is asleep I just want to cry. I feel that in some way I am failing him. I can't get him to behave in school I must be doing something wrong.

Hopefully some day soon I will have an epiphany that can help him. Not sure why I was blessed with such a difficult boy.

TTFN

Update

This was a crazy week. I had to get Phil and the truck ready for Virginia. So after Maddie's therapy Tuesday she and I went to Valvoline and got the truck's oil changed, the inspection done and filled it with gas. We then parked it in the driveway for Phil and Jack to leave for Virginia today. I have been driving the truck lately. Since Phil is working in the field and no longer a supervisor he has a work utility truck. We still own his pick up with the company logo on it. I figured if i drove it it gives them free advertising and possible more work. Can't hurt.

Thursday Maddie and I made the long trek to the pulmonologist. It's kind of the cool because we go up to the Jeff Gordon Children's Hospital. It really is a neat hospital. The doctor gave us some good news. He reduced her breathing treatments to once a day which is great. He said that he did not see a significant change in her in the last 6 weeks. With that to say he also said that if she was going to have complications from her diaphragm paralysis it would have happened by now. At least in most children a complication would have already happened.

So, we are trying it. He said if we need to we can go back to twice a day just call him and let him know. Maddie also weighed 15lbs 13oz. I am not sure about that weighed because they did not weight her the same at the pediatrician. It is hard to believe she gained a pound in a week. So we go for a 9 month check up and get shots Tuesday so we will see what he says.

As for Maddie she is doing great. She can pull her self up and stand. A little wobbly but not bad for 7 mos after open heart surgery. Her therapist is just tickled to death at her recovery. What a Happy baby too. Hopefully I will have more pictures to post soon.

Jack is having a great time in Virginia with Daddy. They called me three times on the way up. I hope the boys have a good time. Katie is going through massive withdraw. She talked to Phil on the phone and told him to come home right now and bring mamaw with him. Phil felt so guilty. We are going to have a girls day Saturday so hopefully she won't miss Daddy so much.

I have tons to do Phil's mom is coming to stay for two weeks and then we are taking her to the beach because Jason, Phil's brother and her son, is getting married. We are Happy for Jason and going down to help him celebrate.

Well it is late and I still have a few things to do.

TTFN

You smell funny.....

As most of you know Phil and I have been together for 12 years and married for 10 this August. Phil is about as regular as the day is long. He likes certain things and dislikes certain things and it has been that way all 12 years. I love candles and the Yankee Candle Company. Phil can't even go in the store because the rush of scents gives him an instant headache. No chic scents either. He likes the cinnamon, pumpkin pie, vanilla, you get the idea. If I want to try a new scent I have to be prepared for him not to like it and not to be able to burn it in the house.

He is also this particular about his deodorant. For 12 years he has worn the same deodorant. I never knew it was part of his personality if you will. The last time I went to the store they were out. I started going into panic mode. He works outdoors he has to have deodorant. What scent do I choose now? What if he gags? So I spent probably 20 minutes in the aisle at the store opening the lids to see if I could find something that smelled close. Finally, after they all started to smell the same I closed my eyes and picked one.

Again because Phil works outdoors there are many days he comes home and showers before bed. Then one night after showering we were laying in bed talking.....I looked at him and said "you smell funny"......it was the new deodorant. He looked at me and said I just showered. The deodorant doesn't suit you. I will go out tomorrow and find your stuff. Needless to say I keep it stocked with the right kind so it doesn't smell like some stranger in my bed.

Just one of those little things..........................

TTFN

makes me smile.....but my toes hurt

A few months back, Katie and I were disagreeing as to the cleanliness of her room. She refused to keep it clean. Once a week I go through really clean their rooms and they are required to maintain it the rest of the week. I had spent most of the day cleaning the house and was stunned at the amount of toys they had collected.

That evening while I was making dinner Katie and Jack played in Katie's room. After dinner we went to go get pj's for the shower and it looked like Geoffrey the Giraffe from Toys R Us crapped in her room. I was so angry. I told her after her shower she would clean it up. She refused. So I went to the garage grabbed trash bags and literally dumped the toy box, every baby doll, barbie, block, princess dress in the bags.

She was yelling at me to stop. I told her if she didn't want to clean her room I would throw all her toys in the trash. She cried herself to sleep. I was mad she wouldn't clean her room, broken-hearted I made her cry, and slap wore out it was 4 trash bags worth of toys. I left the bags in the kitchen so she would have to see it everyday. This happened on a Friday trash day is not till Thursday and I truly did not know what I was going to do with the toys.

Sunday afternoon my 5 year started bartering for toys. Mommy can I have a sleepin' toy. I have been a good girl and helped you clean the living room. OK fair enough you want to redeem yourself and earn back your toys you may pick one toy out of the bags. You would have thought she had just won the lottery. The only thing I did not take from her in her room was her books. Those are not toys and she will always be able to keep those.

As the week went on she earned back some of her toys. But she also had to give some back. I busted her trying to steal some out of the bag. She was ever smart enough to try and ask if she could give some of her toys to Jack, because if Jack had them she could still play with them. When I busted her for sneaking toys out of the bag she had to give back the toys she took and one she earned.

Over all I felt she had learned her lesson and I spent the better part of Thursday putting the toys back. I went through them and took advantage of getting rid of some. So Thursday after noon when she came home from pre-school she was mortified to find the bags were gone. Trying not to cry she asked me where her toys were. I asked her if she had checked her room? Her face lit up like Christmas. She ran up to check, realized all the important treasures had returned. She even came back downstairs and said Thank You Mommy!!!

I know she has learned something in all of this but I learned something too......how really smart my daughter is. She is never allowed to keep toys under her bed. I check it at anytime. Any toys I find under there are mine for an undetermined amount of time. Because I checked it so frequently and it was always clean I got out of the habit of checking it. After the episode above, if Katie has a very treasured item that no one can have she hides it under the bed. When she cleans her room she leaves them under her pillow and after I have checked the under the bed. She puts it back under the bed. If I find it and take it she know she will get it back and what safer place can it be but with Mommy.

The funniest part to this whole experience is Jack his three year old mind kills me. He observed this whole experience and I think at some point figured out Katie's plan to hide her toys was a great idea. How do I know this you wonder.....First of all, in Jack's room his bed consists of a mattress only on the floor for his safety. He has hardwood floors and is a 360 sleeper. Meaning at any given time his body can do all geometric angles. For fear he would hurt himself if he fell out of bed. He is only inches of the ground.

All that to say Jack can not hide things under his bed. So what does he do......he slips them under the big race track rug in the center of his room. Jack has a few treasured toys, but he is mostly a book worm. He loves them. If you tell him to pack his special bag we are going somewhere over half of it is books. So I the unsuspecting person go into his room and stub my toe on a rug only because it is suddenly and inch higher than when I first stepped on it. I have dumped laundry, almost fell, almost cursed in pain.

When I asked him to move it, put the book back in the shelf he said no Mommy when you read to me I want to be ready and no one knows its there. Well he is right no one knows its there because I still trip over it. One day I pulled up the rug and was stunned at what was under there. I put all the toys away. Jack was so mad. When I had left the room I stepped off where he couldn't see me and I watched him put all the treasured items back under the rug. He never did that until Katie's toy episode. All I have to do is threaten to take his toys away or rattle the trash bags and he cleans up.

Over all it was a good learning experience for everyone. Now if I could just stop hurting my toes on the treasures under the rug we would all be happy.

Maddie goes to the doctor Thursday (pulmonologist), we'll see what he says.

TTFN

Instant Joy

Due to my reduced work schedule and Phil's reduced pay we have just enough to go around with almost no extras. I had a little cash squirreled away and needed a few things from the store. Trying to just get the essentials until payday, I tried to only walk down the aisles of the stuff I needed. I decided to get one splurge item. It has been in the eighties and Phil has been working outside so I bought ice cream sandwiches as a treat.

We tell the kids if you are good in school you get 1/2 an ice cream sandwich. If you also eat all your dinner you get 1/2 and ice cream sandwich. So if it is a good day after dinner they get an ice cream sandwich. Jack had earned his, a whole one. So we are all sitting at the dinner table talking, everyone is done except Maddie. Phil is feeding her. So I go to get the ice cream sandwich and hand it to Jack I hear, in a low mumble.......Now that's what I'm talking about mmm mmm mmm.

Katie either didn't hear him or understand him Phil and I just laughed. Who knew one little ice cream sandwich could bring so much joy. I think everyone has just that one little thing that to see it, hear it, smell it, taste it......whatever it is brings instant joy.

I have a few things but one of my favorites is fried pork chops with fried potatoes. I am sure I have been living in the south too long or the country boy I married is wearing off. Who knows. Someone I know calls it comfort food. Whenever she has had a really stressful day at work she goes out for comfort food at lunch there are only two places close to work that serve good comfort food. Every once in a while I ask Phil to make a comfort food meal and that is what I get. I am sure it is one of the worst meals you can have but I always sleep better that night.

Hope you know what your instant joy is?????

TTFN

What a day..................

Today was a kind of groundbreaking day for me. Some things were a sign of relief while others were enough to make me have anxiety attack all in the same 30 minute period. At 7am this morning Phil and I drove Katie,Jack and Maddie to the Daycare/Pre-school. Yes, today Maddie went back to her daycare. They were very excited to have her back and her teacher could barely contain herself.

It brings you a sense of peace that just maybe we might reach an end to this unbelievable journey. As long as Maddie continues to eat well, it is all down hill from here. Lucky for us right now the enrollment is down due to the economy so with less children in the nursery less germs to share. This gives Maddie a better chance. Maddie had a GREAT first day back. Her teacher was very excited at all the things that Maddie could do.....hold her head up, roll in any direction, commando crawl. At the rate things are going right now it will just be a matter of days Maddie can go from being on her belly to sitting up by herself. Probably another week or two before she is crawling on her own. For Maddie today was a Great day!!!!!

After dropping the kids off, Phil and I headed to the elementary school for Katie's kindergarten meeting. I'm not sure about Phil but I was quite impressed and very excited for Katie. The school is amazing!!! It is a public school, we originally hoped for private but with everything we have been through and the economy it is just not possible. Anyway, on a weekly basis Katie as a 5 year old (6 in December) will have a computer class 1 to 2 times a week, Spanish class 2 times a week, art class, not including the regular kindergarten curriculum.

I think Katie is going to be on overload and extremely excited. I did not know Katie could have come this morning. So I am going to see if I can take her to see the school next week. One of the current kindergarten teachers has been at the school since it opened. This alone is a big deal because the school has been around about 12 years. However this teacher lives in another county, she was so impressed with our county school system and this school she asked for permission to bring her children to the school.

When we talked to the cafeteria Manager she was really nice. She was really excited the health department just evaluated them a week ago and they received a 102%. This is the highest score you can get. After the first six weeks we can go to the school and have lunch with Katie. That will be fun. I really hope this will be a great experience for Katie, it appears to be a great school. I have talked to a lot of parents and they have had great experiences. I hope we will too.

Then we have Jack. I think I will spend the rest of my life asking 'What am I going to do with that boy'. He is just having a horrible time at school. He doesn't want to listen to his teachers and so rebellious. If my parents thought I was a rebellious child, not even close and he is only three. I really am beside myself as to what to do with him.

To give you an example....Jack misbehaves....I ask him to sit....I give him an exact spot to sit and he will be two steps over from the spot I told him and he will lay down instead of sit up. I know he is feeling lost and probably trying to get my attention. I read to him 3 to 4 night a week. We do spend some time together I just feel like I am always correcting or reprimanding him. I need to figure out a new plan for him. I have nothing else to do....lol.....I just need to find something that interests him so we get on a better road.

Hopefully, I can come up with some ideas soon before I completely lose control of him. I am sure some of it has to do with being a boy, and the fact that he is a middle child and the back seat he has taken to Maddie but there must be an answer. Hoping to find it soon.

TTFN