Yesterday, I posted this picture on my social media sites. For homework due Friday Madelynn needed to build a time line about her life. I had no idea the power of these pictures when I printed them until we stated to build Madelynn's timeline.
Picture #1 - Madelynn's Birth - A few days after Madelynn's birth we brought her home to begin the adventure of raising 3 kids 4 and under. I sometimes still call it God's sick joke. This picture was from her first bath. Every mother on this planet has a picture just like it. However very few mother's treasure it like I do. It is the only picture I have of her perfect chest before she earned her zipper. If I ever lost this digital copy I would be crushed.
Picture #2 - Open Heart Surgery - 10 weeks almost to the day I surrendered Madelynn to a man who promised me he would give her back. Over a 20 hour period I learned that there was no medical reason Madelynn should be alive, she will fight for every second of her life, a 7 hour surgery seems like days and the shock and awe that rushes over your body when you see your child for the first time after open heart surgery is nothing you will be prepared for. There are no words you can pen to paper that will properly equate to what you see. This picture is close to what I saw. Where I found the strength to not buckle my knees to the floor, only God can answer that.
Picture #3 - Baptism - Before I had ever heard of a CHD I had planned Madelynn's baptism. It was to be a grand family event and I was thrilled my parents, siblings and their families would be here for it. However, I postponed it. I called the church and explained what had happened. The very sweet lady on the other end offered to have the priest come to the hospital to baptize Madelynn. I quickly said No. I told my family I wanted her baptized like my other children.
What very few people know is that I was afraid to have her baptized at the hospital. I felt if I had her baptized I was giving permission for God to take her home with Him. I was not ok with that. When baptism day finally came she was six weeks away from her first birthday. As we were standing around in the hallway of the church it hit me. We had made it to a place where Madelynn was going to make it. She was still working out a few kinks but I felt like we made it. At that moment, tears just started rolling down my face and I could not make them stop. It was as if EVERY tear I held in for all of those months had permission to flow. It was an incredibly freeing moment.
Picture #4 - 1st Annual Camp LUCK Family Camp - Throughout our heart journey I have met some pretty stellar heart families. Some of their stories made ours seem like standard operating procedure. We learned what our new normal was and made some amazing new friends. Camp LUCK (Lucky Unlimted Cardiac Kids) supports families like ours in lots of different ways (www.campluck.com). One of those adventures is to go the Camp Cherokee for the weekend as a family, live in a cabin, "unzip" from the chaos of the outside world and live in that moment right there. Madelynn has been to every one. This picture is her at the first one in 2010 at 21 months old. When I see this picture it gives me permission to exhale.
Picture #5 - First day of Kindergarten - I cried all the way to work that day. We had reached a milestone some days I thought were impossible. When I was making weekly visit to the pediatricians office, monthly visits to the pediatric cardiologist, monthly visits to the pediatric pulmunologist, weekly physical therapy, multiple ER visits kindergarten was the furthest thing from my mind. The peak of the mountain we were climbing was in view and I was finally go to see what was on the other side. We were lucky enough to reach a point that an unacceptable amount of heart warriors never see.
Picture #6 - 1st Soccer Game - Madelynn's Heart and Lung doctors both cleared her to play soccer. At different appointments they both said almost the same thing verbatim. The only way to know if she can do it is to let her try. Madelynn suffered a collapsed lung and paralysis in her diaphragm after her OHS. At her last x-ray her diaphragm still did not contracted completely as it should. But at her last breathing test she scored better than the average normal person. To see her in a soccer uniform, running with the boys, scoring goals my heart is overflowing. Not only did God and the doctors give her back to me it was done 10 fold.
Picture #7 and #8 - Remember when I told you we had reached the peak of the mountain and I wanted to see what was on the other side. This is the beginning of the other side. Dairy Queen had their Miracle Treat Day. My friend at the Hospital Foundation said tell me that you went and I will have prizes for the kids. So I emailed her a photo of Madelynn eating her blizzard. She was so thrilled she asked if they could take more pictures of Madelynn . One of those photos was to go with a small write up in in the Hospital Foundation Magazine. I asked for a few copies to share with my family. To my speechless astonishment she was put on the cover. I was so excited I was shaking.
Some time after that I was asked if that photo could be entered in the Dairy Queen Children's Miracle Network photo contest. She won!! She was on all the Dairy Queen handouts for the Children's Miracle Network for the second quarter of the year. These were the posters that were hung in all the stores across the country. Friends from all over sent us photos standing next to the photo of Madelynn. We were traveling back from DC and stopped at a truck stop that had a Dairy Queen attached. Low and Behold there was Madelynn right in the center aisle poster size. It was the first time I had seen one and an affirmation that we were on the other side.
For Madelynn to have to complete this assignment for CHD Awareness week was God's plan all along. It is just another reminder God has big plans for.
TTFN~
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