Expectations, Hopes and Dreams......

As parents whether rookies or veterans we have certain expectations, hopes and dreams for our children. When you are suddenly given the devastating diagnosis that your child was, is or will be born with a broken heart your own heart shatters. Everything changes....forever.

 

There is a point where we, as parents, need to grieve for the loss of the life you thought your child would have. I know it sounds a little silly to some. Hanging on to these old ideals allows the demons of what we thought would be, to slowly tear us apart from the inside. Letting go of the previous expectations, hopes and dreams allows for an empty palette where the sky is the limit.

 

Having this clean slate we, as parents, can give our children that 110% they expect. It allows for educating ourselves about this new life, finding support groups of other families travelling the same dirt road and a new perspective of what life can really be like.

 

Sometimes we also end up letting go of friends we had before the diagnosis. Friends who have never had a chronically ill child simply do not understand. They want to make sense of it but they can't and sometimes we have to let them go. They don't comprehend germ control, special diets or required medical treatments. For no other reason than they have a heart healthy child. Other heart families know this as a way of life and don't bat an eye at it. Grieving for the loss of pre-diagnosis friends allows us to be open to accepting of new comrades in the battle of congenital heart defects.

 

I personally was lucky my best friend was a nurse. Even though she didn't know the first thing about being a heart mom, her medical training made her an invaluable resource as each day passed. Had I not let go of my expectations, I would have missed great opportunities and new friends that are worth their weight in gold.

 

Today my heart warrior’s prognosis is excellent. However, had I not relinquished my pre-diagnosis expectations, hopes and dreams, and took the time to redesign the empty palette I would not have my priceless piece of art.

TTFN~