Friends

Recently I was on a non-profit face book page about CHD's. Parents, mostly mom's, were talking about how since their child was diagnosed with their CHD they have lost friends. My first thought was well then they really weren't your friend. However, that usually isn't true. Most of the time people don't know what to do when they know nothing about your situation. So yes there is always two sides to every story.

When it came to our story in many ways so many people surprised us. I had a friend everyday, yes everyday, for 21 days she called me to get her "Maddie update". She probably didn't know half the stuff I was talking about but she would listen and some days I just needed normal human contact other than medical staff. There are a few people I thought were friends, but when my life path changed and these people didn't cross my path anymore, I tried to keep in touch, they did not. I have to say maybe I could have tried harder but my life did not have time for me to try harder.

We also have friends that are neighbors we have known since they moved in. They stepped in and just did whatever we asked without question. I knew when Katie and Jack were in their care I never had to worry. We even had friends calling almost everyday wanting to know what we needed. These friends really wanted to help and just patiently waited. When we called they were there. All of these friends knew nothing about heart patients or could relate to anything we were experiencing on our journey. They were just there.

These same friends I still see several times a week. Our life is getting back to normal, whatever that is, and these friends are still there. Our life would not be complete without them, so much so they are almost like an extension of our family.

Don't get me wrong our family was there and in many ways went out of their way for us. Did things they didn't have too, but they do not live here. Only my parents live here and live 30-45 minutes away depending on the day. So on one of those days when I needed human contact or Maddie was not doing well I could always call one of them and they would be here. There will never be enough words to say Thank You for that.

We have also met and friend-ed lots of other heart families. Some of them have similar stories to ours while others have travelled a much more treacherous journey. Being around other heart families life was easier in so many ways. You already know about keeping germs away, there is a respect and understanding that never has to be explained if a child has a limitation, you just went with it. In the presence of other heart families someone has already experienced it if you want to know about it, ask.

It is really sad to hear about women and families who thought they could depend on "friends" that just walked out of their lives when the road turned into a roller coaster. I was glad to see that they have found "real friends". As for us, I am truly grateful for my friends that checked on us and really meant it when they asked if we needed anything. Hopefully someday we can return the favors and there are so many.........

TTFN~